Ya know, considering this thing offers to remember my username and password, every time I check it, I have to log back in. Makes me seriously wonder at the simplistic software blogspace uses. You'd think they could at least make it a little more user friendly in that aspect.
Payday friday, gimped 20 hours on the paycheck, technically 30 hours. But Overtime is a god send. So I made it by rent and such no problem. I get $33 in my wallet to last me to the 9th. So that is going to be great fun too. I think I have a date cemented for moving now as well, the 15th by the looks.
Meaning shortly I'll be out of this place, and into a much smaller room in an apartment that can't hold all my crap, with a friend whom I've known five months. Sounds like a blast, huh? Honestly, as bad as it sounds, it isn't going to be bad at all. I am looking forward to it really. Kat is a great girl, and a trustworthy friend, I mean hell, she offered me a place to live when there were other options out there, like Zac......Hey, I said options, I never said -good- options.
Gerry's coming back in April -Squee!!- yeah, that is a girly sound, like I fucking care. I miss him a hell of a lot. He's my Bro, blood is thicker then water, and the bond between myself and Gerry, makes blood look thin. I know he doesn't see our friendship -quite- like that, but to me, heis a Brother. I don't use such a title lightly.
My net crapped out on me this weekend, ironically shortly after I was forced to make the first payment on it. Go figure, now that I'm giving them money for the service, they are gonna screw me over. Typical enough. At least it is up and running now.
Love life...Confusing. Enough so that I'm not going to bother posting about it tonight. Hell, its not so much confusing as near non-existent. Then again, for a guy looking for the long term, you don't really get that far when 89% of women want to have children in their future, and you can't have children. Ah well, was a responsible decision in the end. So shit happens.
Thus is life.
Zodiak, Out.
Monday, January 29, 2007
Friday, January 26, 2007
Red Flags, Fate's Amusement
I don't usually read much into tarot readings, or horoscopes, not regularly anyways. I've had my palm read, have had tarot readings done for me, and they tend to be accurate. I just prefer not to know what is coming, there's more challenge to the unknown.
I've only ever read my base horoscope, that as an aquarius I behave a certain way. However there's been two occasions when I have read my day-to-day horoscope, where the position of the stars are supposed to tell you how things will go for you in the next week or so. The last time was back in 2004 when a dear friend of mine passed away, and my horoscope warned me of a sorrowful loss. The second time was yesterday. Now its telling me that my love life will experience a sudden change, and to not hesitate in making a move.
Now under most circumstances, I'd call that foolishness and a load of crap. However, considering what has happened in my life since friday, it makes far too much sense, especially when my horoscope says the same thing for seven days straight.
I also found out that despite how it -sounds- to my ears, my instinct is not as bad as I thought it would be. So I am still intact mentally, even if I am attracted to a girl, my advice is still sound. So it -isn't- just my selfish reasoning of wanting her for myself that sends up red flags when her boyfriend stalks her and threatens to beat in the head of any man she looks at. Thanks to some friends who pointed this out to me.
So that at least tells I'm not head over heels. Which of course if I truly thought I was, I'd be getting the hell out of Dodge quite quickly. I can't be doing that easy-in/hard-out shit anymore. I was like that far too much in my youth, and it burned my heart out by the end of the phase. I'm ahead of that and grown out of it. I can't bloody well be dropped down for a pair of pretty eyes and great personality.
Next topic.
Why the hell is it that every paycheck almost never looks right, despite the fact I know it is. Taxes are seriously killing me in this work force. I should have gotten paid $660, but then I was told my 50 hrs week would give me 6hrs time and a half. So that would bump it up to $699. How does that manage to rip down $120? It is near to 18%!! I mean come on, there are some things that just are -not- right, and taxing 17-18% on small change is one of them.
This weekend, I was supposed to go to the casino with some friends for my birthday, not happening. Might hit a movie with a friend, a few decent ones came out this week. Or I may simply stay at home and play World of Warcraft and try to get as close to level 40 as possible. I have no idea, I was also invited for roleplay, but I'm not in the best of moods for D&D or WW right now. I need to do a little shopping for a change, and decide if I am buying $80 worth of bus passes again this month to have some money on this paycheck, or dropping $68 today for the monthly. I think I'll probably do the $80 route. its a $12 loss, but it is also the month of february, it will be cheaper for me I think, to get the passes.
And now work is calling, I am so going to need a coffee today. Just need to make sure I don't pull a 44hr run like I did last weekend. Or hell, why not?
The Zodiak, Out.
I've only ever read my base horoscope, that as an aquarius I behave a certain way. However there's been two occasions when I have read my day-to-day horoscope, where the position of the stars are supposed to tell you how things will go for you in the next week or so. The last time was back in 2004 when a dear friend of mine passed away, and my horoscope warned me of a sorrowful loss. The second time was yesterday. Now its telling me that my love life will experience a sudden change, and to not hesitate in making a move.
Now under most circumstances, I'd call that foolishness and a load of crap. However, considering what has happened in my life since friday, it makes far too much sense, especially when my horoscope says the same thing for seven days straight.
I also found out that despite how it -sounds- to my ears, my instinct is not as bad as I thought it would be. So I am still intact mentally, even if I am attracted to a girl, my advice is still sound. So it -isn't- just my selfish reasoning of wanting her for myself that sends up red flags when her boyfriend stalks her and threatens to beat in the head of any man she looks at. Thanks to some friends who pointed this out to me.
So that at least tells I'm not head over heels. Which of course if I truly thought I was, I'd be getting the hell out of Dodge quite quickly. I can't be doing that easy-in/hard-out shit anymore. I was like that far too much in my youth, and it burned my heart out by the end of the phase. I'm ahead of that and grown out of it. I can't bloody well be dropped down for a pair of pretty eyes and great personality.
Next topic.
Why the hell is it that every paycheck almost never looks right, despite the fact I know it is. Taxes are seriously killing me in this work force. I should have gotten paid $660, but then I was told my 50 hrs week would give me 6hrs time and a half. So that would bump it up to $699. How does that manage to rip down $120? It is near to 18%!! I mean come on, there are some things that just are -not- right, and taxing 17-18% on small change is one of them.
This weekend, I was supposed to go to the casino with some friends for my birthday, not happening. Might hit a movie with a friend, a few decent ones came out this week. Or I may simply stay at home and play World of Warcraft and try to get as close to level 40 as possible. I have no idea, I was also invited for roleplay, but I'm not in the best of moods for D&D or WW right now. I need to do a little shopping for a change, and decide if I am buying $80 worth of bus passes again this month to have some money on this paycheck, or dropping $68 today for the monthly. I think I'll probably do the $80 route. its a $12 loss, but it is also the month of february, it will be cheaper for me I think, to get the passes.
And now work is calling, I am so going to need a coffee today. Just need to make sure I don't pull a 44hr run like I did last weekend. Or hell, why not?
The Zodiak, Out.
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Another Year, Another Day.
Happy birthday to Me. Guess I can't complain too much, nothing absurdly happened. Far from my 18th birthday.
So now I'm twenty-two. I suppose it isn't a bad progression, I'm still single and likely will be for some time, but on the brighter side, I'm independent of family, living on my own (roommates don't count) and have a steady job that pays well.
I can't help but think that things may end up going awry for me somewhere down the line, and not a long ways down, but a shortways. I looked in the mirror this morning, and thought to myself, "predictions don't mean everything." When I was young, it was predicted I would die before I was 22, and if not then, then shortly after.
Be it suicide or something entirely different, didn't matter to the prediction. I'm beginning to think it won't happen, and it likely won't. Unless of course it already has happened, and the definition of death is something much more broad. I've felt dead inside for two years now, ever since Dawn. Hell, before her, I don't remember when I lost true feeling, sometime after Teresa, before Caroline. However it works out or looks, emotion broke away from the true workings inside a long time ago.
Its been four-five years, since I was with Teresa, the last woman I can say I loved, and not be lying. I wonder if I will love in the future, I didn't love Morri, nor Caroline, nor Dawn. I never spoke those words to them either. So who is to say when I will love again, or even if I'm capable of it.
I tend to ramble around these times of years, holidays, birthday, etc. Times when friends, family, and love, play an important part in one's life. I don't have any family, and love is a fleeting hope, a word which meaning is a beautiful myth to me. Friends I have, few and far between, and it makes me wish I could make more as easily as others.
Finally finished watching DN Angel tonight. Awesome anime series. It definitely impressed me. After watching it, I started on Final Fantasy Unlimited. It didn't impress me. I will probably watch an episode or four before I realize why they cancelled the series before finishing it. The first episode was poorly drawn and the story is too much like a video game -right down to the victory music when the monster was killed- so I don't think it will be something I get too deep into.
Now I sleep, and dream chaotic dreams, and think to myself as I drift into darkness, "What comes next?" Simple...Work in the morning, and life in the future.
Peace out.
The Zodiak.
So now I'm twenty-two. I suppose it isn't a bad progression, I'm still single and likely will be for some time, but on the brighter side, I'm independent of family, living on my own (roommates don't count) and have a steady job that pays well.
I can't help but think that things may end up going awry for me somewhere down the line, and not a long ways down, but a shortways. I looked in the mirror this morning, and thought to myself, "predictions don't mean everything." When I was young, it was predicted I would die before I was 22, and if not then, then shortly after.
Be it suicide or something entirely different, didn't matter to the prediction. I'm beginning to think it won't happen, and it likely won't. Unless of course it already has happened, and the definition of death is something much more broad. I've felt dead inside for two years now, ever since Dawn. Hell, before her, I don't remember when I lost true feeling, sometime after Teresa, before Caroline. However it works out or looks, emotion broke away from the true workings inside a long time ago.
Its been four-five years, since I was with Teresa, the last woman I can say I loved, and not be lying. I wonder if I will love in the future, I didn't love Morri, nor Caroline, nor Dawn. I never spoke those words to them either. So who is to say when I will love again, or even if I'm capable of it.
I tend to ramble around these times of years, holidays, birthday, etc. Times when friends, family, and love, play an important part in one's life. I don't have any family, and love is a fleeting hope, a word which meaning is a beautiful myth to me. Friends I have, few and far between, and it makes me wish I could make more as easily as others.
Finally finished watching DN Angel tonight. Awesome anime series. It definitely impressed me. After watching it, I started on Final Fantasy Unlimited. It didn't impress me. I will probably watch an episode or four before I realize why they cancelled the series before finishing it. The first episode was poorly drawn and the story is too much like a video game -right down to the victory music when the monster was killed- so I don't think it will be something I get too deep into.
Now I sleep, and dream chaotic dreams, and think to myself as I drift into darkness, "What comes next?" Simple...Work in the morning, and life in the future.
Peace out.
The Zodiak.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Dark Dilemma
Alright, so what does one do, when one meets a girl, whom is attractive, funny, smart, kind, and in a relationship?
Simple, you ask your friends for advice, then totally disregard it all and do something stupid anyways. I mean hey, what is the fun of life if you don't make your own mistakes and see how far you can push things?
Granted, there is always the up and downside to everything, especially when you post stuff like this, I mean hell, what stops her from reading it, what stops other people from reading it? What makes me care what other people think. I seriously miss the way I used to be, back when I thrived in drama and politics.
Once upon a time, right? I imagine I'll let my instincts and heart lead me to where my head is screaming is a bad idea. Well, not so much bad, just not the best of ideas. I mean hell, last girl I had an interest in, blew me off like it was nothing. Rejection stings, but if you don't shoot for the target and miss, you can't hit it that one time you get lucky.
I'll probably just do what I always do, move forward, take the cards I'm dealt, stack the deck, and then play my hand with the cards I wanted.
In the end, what happens happens, and I won't be stopping any of it by sitting here doing nothing about it. Probably helping it by keeping it friendly and slow. I prefer not to jump the gun.
Simple, you ask your friends for advice, then totally disregard it all and do something stupid anyways. I mean hey, what is the fun of life if you don't make your own mistakes and see how far you can push things?
Granted, there is always the up and downside to everything, especially when you post stuff like this, I mean hell, what stops her from reading it, what stops other people from reading it? What makes me care what other people think. I seriously miss the way I used to be, back when I thrived in drama and politics.
Once upon a time, right? I imagine I'll let my instincts and heart lead me to where my head is screaming is a bad idea. Well, not so much bad, just not the best of ideas. I mean hell, last girl I had an interest in, blew me off like it was nothing. Rejection stings, but if you don't shoot for the target and miss, you can't hit it that one time you get lucky.
I'll probably just do what I always do, move forward, take the cards I'm dealt, stack the deck, and then play my hand with the cards I wanted.
In the end, what happens happens, and I won't be stopping any of it by sitting here doing nothing about it. Probably helping it by keeping it friendly and slow. I prefer not to jump the gun.
It Has Begun
Well, after ten years of refusing to get one of these things, it seems like I have. Granted it was prompted by my supervisor at work, who also has one. I guess the next step is to do that myspace crap and then start monitoring random "top five" lists to see if I make top five somewhere.
I don't know what I'm thinking with this, ah well, a place to vent thoughts is better then simply bottling it up, even if everyone can read it. I suppose it is more interesting when someone can read it, and then feed back on it.
As long as you don't bash up too many people, would be great.
So the opening post would have to be about this past weekend, a whole weekend of gaming and no sleep. I got home from work friday night, and dove into WoW right off. I got into a bet with a friend which had me up until 8am sunday morning. I kinda feel bad for passing out, cuz I was supposed to meet Nic in WoW around noon.
I suppose there is little to be done when you become waffle faced on your keyboard, right? I hope he accepts my appology and is still willing to let me game with him. Not often I actually find a guy I like who is in a position of authority over me. I hate authority figures, but I get along with him, so that is cool. He even approached me about it, so that tells me he isn't doing it just to be nice, but that he is interested.
Well, in either event, there is a lot more to things then games, life and love etc. Not sure how much to elaborate on that. The first post is done, maybe I'll make another.
The Zodiak, out.
I don't know what I'm thinking with this, ah well, a place to vent thoughts is better then simply bottling it up, even if everyone can read it. I suppose it is more interesting when someone can read it, and then feed back on it.
As long as you don't bash up too many people, would be great.
So the opening post would have to be about this past weekend, a whole weekend of gaming and no sleep. I got home from work friday night, and dove into WoW right off. I got into a bet with a friend which had me up until 8am sunday morning. I kinda feel bad for passing out, cuz I was supposed to meet Nic in WoW around noon.
I suppose there is little to be done when you become waffle faced on your keyboard, right? I hope he accepts my appology and is still willing to let me game with him. Not often I actually find a guy I like who is in a position of authority over me. I hate authority figures, but I get along with him, so that is cool. He even approached me about it, so that tells me he isn't doing it just to be nice, but that he is interested.
Well, in either event, there is a lot more to things then games, life and love etc. Not sure how much to elaborate on that. The first post is done, maybe I'll make another.
The Zodiak, out.
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