Now, I know some of you are friends, others are family (at least one of you) And others still are just random people I'd almost think creepy if I didn't know how weird the world was to begin with.
Whether you read this to keep up on my life, to amuse your own, or to merely see what kind of poetry I may or may not write, it doesn't matter, I lost a friend today, an old old friend. Not to death, no, to immature bullshit.
However, my readers, it is something I wanted to share, including the email leading up to this. One email is missing, the original, which I can summarize easily enough.
I sent Gerry an email, this email was simple enough, it could be summarized with:
Gerry, look, if you have an issue with me caring for my girlfriend more then rolling dice, then there isn't a whole lot to talk about then. The fact I am with Mecca and she makes me happy is all I really need. How you can fault me for wanting to be with her, as opposed to someone i don't even like, is rather naive. Then again, the fact you will no longer game with me because I took time out to make sure she was ok, kind of says that as well. So no, I am not like Zac, because I haven't ditched my friends for a woman whom I am stalking, I actually have the girl. I still hang out with my friends, I've gamed with Nick, Jenn, Chris, I hang out with Kat and Ryan and people from work. You just don't like that I don't hang out with you, which I find unfortunate. So if you can ever get over this, we can talk, cuz I still love you. Your brother, always. Love, Chris.
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That was the first email. A little harsh, but it ended with a note that said I still and always will, care. His response:
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Childish bull shit, you dont even have the balls to Drop a conflict with some one who dd nothing wrong in reailty. Yeah i like zac i have for many years, i put up with the bs because deep down in his hear he is a golden kid and thats the bottom line. chris you two are a lot alike, and if you keep rippin on the guy who has been there since i was 7 years old your stuck in high school, and i am above that, If you rip on zac again, I wll be done with you for good!
Im sorry man the truth about it is, zac fucks up, lies, cant hold a job, But he cares he loves , he is smart and deep deep down He knows he and i are a team, he gets in shit i get him out of shit. If you cant accet the kid enought to game together.... you have issues, you cant drop problems, you have problems wth so many people, so my friend untill you grow up and realize that the way you can be is troublesum and the way you treat mecca in public and around your friends makes me sick to my stomache (im a for woman power all the way man) Then you and i will not be talking
BOTTOM LINE
Peace
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My response:
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Zac stuff aside, because honestly, that doesn't mean anything to me one way or another. How I handle situations with people I don't get along with is no one's business but my own.
Mecca and I are in a relationship, one that works for her and I. You can be all about woman power, go for it man, good for you and I'm all for your opinion which I respect as an individual. I'm all for woman power too, go feminism, all for equal rights. Another thing I'm all for. But what is between Mecca and I is -ours-...It wasn't set out as a condition for our relationship. I didn't say, "you must act as slave unto me." No, she did that not only without me asking, but with me telling her straight up she didn't have to and I didn't expect, nor want it from her. When I found out it was what she wanted and moreso, our relationship that way made her feel special...It is what we will continue to do. If you can't respect my lifestyle choice at least enough to act mature about it, then I don't know if we can be friends no matter how other things work out.
Peace,
Chris.
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His reply:
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ok sure, What ever....
there are alot of us in WoW that are wondering why you are not paying us money that you owe now that your cancling. You owe since you are cancling before you hit 70, its brutal that me aci and settie did so much for you, so i wil be expecting my pay out...
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Now, it should be noted, he called me juvenile (high school) by not forgiving Zac....yet he says this. Makes me wonder where his arguments went. My reply to this was as follows:
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Excuse me??? I fucking never borrowed gold from you at ANY fucking time. YOU fucking borrowed from me!
I never borrowed from Ehm or Setti either. Go fuck yourself Gerry, that is pretty fucking low.
I may return to WoW in the future, if I do, I won't be gimped in it because someone I play with/used to play with wants to get some fucked up little power trip thinking I owe him shit.
You want to say I'm still in high school? You lied about a video game to get off the phone with me, and THEN decide you want my shit -in- the game because I'm quitting to save myself money? Looks like I made the right choice in changing my password yesterday. I felt guilty that I was doing it, thinking I should trust you more, after this though, I clearly made the right choice.
What the fuck has gotten into you, Gerry? First you get bitchy cuz I have a concern for my girlfriend and you don't want to game with me. Then you get pissy because I won't hang out with Zac, and prefer to spend time with Mecca then someone I don't even like. Then you tell me the way I treat her is wrong (I didn't know buying my girlfriend shit, taking her places, and living my lifestyle which she shares was wrong) and can't respect my lifestyle when you TOLD ME that you could. And now, now you are bitching about a fucking VIDEO GAME that I decided not to play for awhile.
Wow man.....Just wow....It burn you that much that you aren't my number 1 priority as a friend anymore? Is it that hard to not be in the driver's seat with first dibs on my plans and actions? I'm all for the saying "bros before hoes" and Mecca even knows that, but last night shows its not about the girl, its about how I "treat" her, and that makes it about me and my lifestyle choice, a lifestyle I was involved in before I even knew you.
No Gerry, you aren't getting my shit. No Gerry, I'm not giving you gold in a fantasy video game. No Gerry, I'm not dumping my girlfriend to hang out with you. No Gerry, I'm not becoming a vanilla bitched whipped boy because you don't want to be alone in the category.
With that said, and my mind -finally- calming down. Why don't -you- get in touch with -me- when you grow up?
Otherwise, don't bother responding to this email, cuz its just going to get deleted.
Chris.
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Yeah, I flipped. The guy switched gears way too much to finally use a video game in the end to try and cheap shot me? His final response:
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Go to hell your a loser who is going no where in his already fucked up life
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Not even kind enough to sign it.
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Now, I read that last email at least a dozen times, thinking what I could do to him, write back, rip him apart. The problem with being me, is I know what to say and how to say it to hurt someone. I obviously struck a nerve on him without trying, what would happen with effort?
Gerry burned the bridges behind us, and it hurts me that he would. However it won't change anything at this point with his behaviour. Its just life, right? People come and go, including friends, those you think are your friend, no matter if you've known them a day or 5 years.
So, dear readers, tell me...Am I being petty in this? Unreasonable? Is it really something so bad and horrid that I should ask forgiveness? Before anyone says that posting this alone makes me petty, however I've already ruled that out because I did it just for genuine opinions.
So please, comments are welcome, make them at will, I actually look forward to seeing how other people view the situation en masse.
Peace out,
The Zodiak.
7 comments:
After reading this a few times and thinking about it, it seems your friend is only giving you this much grief about your relationship with Mecca because he is insecure in his own friendship with you. Your friend seems to be more concerned with keeping you his friend that he can't see that he's pushing you away by trying to remove your girlfriend from the picture.
His comment about WoW was low. He seems to only be crying for your attention instead of trying to be your friend.
He doesn't seem worth your time. People outgrow people.
Life Happens.
Good luck, where ever life takes you.
Death Jester.
Move on, Zodiak.. Your life up to this point, has been dependent upon those like Zac and Gerry as friends and you're to a point of independence now, in a LOT of ways.. Continue those steps forwards and don't look back, save for the occasional fond memory of different times..
Make or break in Your relationship with Mecca, You still don't need those that would hold You back selfishly, and I highly doubt that the 'who' makes a difference.. If not Mecca, then the next would interfere..
You're on a different course now.. You have a future to think about and now that You are partnered up, You should also be seeking out others that are, and enjoying couples outings.. Gaming, might now just become a pasttime during hours of insomnia and that's not a bad thing..
Much love.. always..
Bobbi.
It's good to see nothing has changed. its only been like 6 yrs; why should it?
After all- everyone in that circle still seems petty and unforgiving and you still seem unwilling to accept ppl no matter how many ways they DONT do anything wrong.
Admittedly though- you're both at fault with this one.
In my personal opinion, which you never gave a shit about- the more you two say you wanna stop being immature, the more you say:
"You started it"
"You did..."
"I want ..."
"Me..me... me"
Yup- good to see nothing's changed.
(Btw- I am only posting since your msn said u wanted comments)
And that is typical of people on the internet, too scared and full of it to even sign a name.
Chris, you're not in the wrong on this one, though you as as often as not; Gerry needs to decide if its your friendship he values, or just picking things apart in your life.
High school is behind though, you really should shrug the childish stuff off and walk it off.
Sarah.
Its ok, Sarah. Qris, DJ, thanks for your comments. The opinion is as always, valued.
For the one of four comments that is negative, I already know who wrote it, its the only person who has my MSN that is enough of a hypocrite to think he has a right to talk.
I accept his opinion as much as anyone else's, but remember, man, you aren't better then us either, and haven't changed in those six years anymore then anyone else in the group. Your opinion holds value, I won't disregard it, but try not to be so judgmental in the future, since you judge yourself as well.
Still looking for more comments too, everyone. So please, keep em coming.
Chris/TheZodiak.
So I've read this a few times and I'm still not sure how you're at fault, if any. From my understanding, you were taking care of Mecca and Gerry couldn't handle it. Too bad for him. I think DJ and Bobbi said it best, though.
In the end, it comes down to why should gaming be more important than your relationship?
Love ya, bro.
-Erin
Hahaha you should have listened to your friend Gerry way back then......if you'd have treated Mecca better then maybe you would still have her...but probably not!! Too bad you switched back to that "WoW is more important than real life" mentality
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