Don't have a Heart Attack

Yes, another entry.

One a day for three days straight. I'm trying to decide if I want to make this the norm. It would stop shit from building up and exploding in verbal...er... text diarhea.

At the same time, we all know I don't have the commitment to something enough to actually make this a daily thing. In the mean time, why not take it while its there and run with it while it exists?

I've been in a blah'ish mood lately. Made worse by back pain, and minor headache, being perpetually tired, and have ideas on what to write and how, yet having no inspiration to get it off the ground (likely attributed to being too tired to write).

I've been staying off of WoW a fair bit, hopping on to do Dailies, or Raids, the odd run when asked. Mostly because I've been trying to spend more time with Sarah, which sadly comes down to two things... 1) I'm not picky about what I do, and don't have a preference to anything specific because I'm always willing to do near anything, and 2) She's essentially the same way.

The problem is, we have different ideas for default. For me its shows/movies and WoW, for her, its talking about writing or possible exercise.

Sadly, with my mental exhaustion as of late, talking about writing garners as much attention as to say, "Yes, that sounds great. You should do that." and as much as I'm sincere in it, my mind draws a horrible blank when she follows up with, "Why is it great? What do you think will happen next?"

Sure, I'm great at human nature, and am superb at predicting what will happen... But as of late, I can barely read myself, let alone read into a story that already takes a number of turns and twists. Its a great story, I'd even read it were it published (a feat for me considering my aversion to first person stories).

I can't help but wonder if the lack of anything is in essence linked to the back pain. Its been hampering my work, affecting my social life, stopping me from doing things I want to do. I have a doctor's appointment on monday, and I can only hope it will be productive enough to warrant another appointment later in the week in order to fill out medical forms to actually show that yes, I have an issue, and yes, I'm working on it.

I still haven't done the math for this pay check, but I do know I can make it stretch enough to actually give Sarah enough money to buy proper groceries for the next few weeks.

I want to write, but I can't. This bothers me. Velrik's story has been pounding in my head, even as Gaze's story sits dead in the water aside from an opening scene of him being chased by hounds. Yes, this part should be on my other journal, but fuck you, its my journal and I'll blog if I want to.

There's not much more to say pertaining to things going on right now. Feeling as I do as of late, it's just one of those times.

Peace out,

The Zodiak.